The Lesson I Learned at Lunch (That Changed Everything About How I Move Through the World)

Some memories stay with you for reasons you don’t fully understand until much later. For me, one of those moments happened in college, during a random weekday lunch in Chicago — the kind of day you don’t expect to shape you at all.

A friend of a friend had invited me to this very fancy restaurant. She was older, married, elegant in that effortless way, and one of those people who gives life advice without ever making it feel like advice. Just wisdom wrapped in kindness.

We sat down, ordered drinks, talked about school, work, life. And every time the waiter came by, she would look them in the eye, smile, and say “thank you.” Not in a performative way — genuinely. Consistently. Intentionally.

At one point I must have looked a little surprised, because she gently leaned toward me and said something I will never forget:

“Their job is to serve you, but it doesn’t cost you anything to be respectful. Say thank you. It changes everything.”

It was so simple. Almost too simple.

But it stuck.

And once I started putting it into practice — not just with servers, but with strangers, baristas, TSA agents, hotel staff, the random person who holds the door — I noticed something shift.

Not only in the way people responded to me, but in the way I felt moving through the world.

Gratitude softens you.

Being kind makes you lighter.

And acknowledging people — really seeing them — is one of the easiest ways to put something good into the world.

We underestimate how powerful a small gesture can be.

But trust me… it goes a long way.

That lunch taught me that being nice isn’t naïve. Being grateful isn’t extra.

It’s a form of self-respect, too. It says, I choose to move through life with softness instead of entitlement.

And in a world that constantly feels rushed, loud, and overwhelming, kindness is a quiet rebellion — one I’m still committed to every single day.